How Selfgentle Are You, Really?
Take the Quiz
This short selfgentleness assessment invites you to reflect on how you respond to yourself when life feels demanding, uncomfortable, or emotionally charged.
There are no right or wrong answers. What matters is not how you wish you would respond, but what you usually do in real moments. It takes about 3 to 4 minutes.
At the end, you’ll receive a short personal reflection by email so you can read it calmly, in your own time.
How Selfgentle Are You, Really?
Take the Quiz
This short assessment invites you to reflect on how you tend to respond to yourself when life feels demanding, uncomfortable, or emotionally charged. There are no right or wrong answers. What matters is not how you wish you would respond, but what you usually do in real moments.
At the end of the assessment, you’ll receive a short reflection on where you are in your relationship with yourself. This reflection is shared by email, so you can read it calmly, in your own time.
It takes about 3–4 minutes to complete. When you’re ready, continue below.
What You’ll Explore in This Quiz
Inner dialogue
Emotional capacity
Boundaries under pressure
How you speak to yourself when something goes wrong or when you feel you are not doing enough.
How you respond to uncomfortable emotions instead of pushing them away or judging yourself for having them.
This short selfgentleness assessment gently looks at three areas of your relationship with yourself:
How you stay connected to what you need when life becomes demanding, rather than overriding yourself.
What Does It Mean to Be Selfgentle?
Being selfgentle does not mean you feel peaceful all the time. It does not mean you avoid responsibility or difficult conversations. It means that when you are under pressure, you do not abandon yourself.
Selfgentleness is closely related to self-compassion and mindfulness, but it goes one step further. It is not only about understanding yourself kindly. It is about building a stable, lived relationship with yourself. A relationship where you can notice what you feel, honor what you need, and take action from that place.
In this quiz, you explore how that relationship currently functions in your daily life.
Selfgentleness means radically accepting yourself as the most important person to consistently deserve your own gentleness.
About the Creator
This selfgentleness quiz was created by Dr. Femke E. Bakker, behavioral scientist and founder of the Selfgentleness Academy. For over a decade, she has studied how people respond under pressure and how inner patterns shape behavior. Her work now focuses on helping reflective adults build a stable and kind relationship with themselves.
