what people say about selfgentleness
Femke Bakker Reviews
These are real words from real people who have worked with Femke, in the Selfgentleness Academy, in a workshop, or in a personal session. Some also found her through her meditations. What they describe is not a technique that worked for a while. It is something that shifted underneath.
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course students
average rating
What it feels like to stop being so hard on yourself
Does selfgentleness actually work if you've tried everything else?
what people experience
I had never heard the term 'selfgentle' and now I think of it daily. It is just what I need to put myself, my physical comfort, and my emotional well being first.
Maria, USA
I was able to go into deep memories and find self-love I forgot existed within myself. I'm grateful for the transformation I've begun, and for what's to come as I continue using these meditations.
Mark
Essentially it is building the muscle that helps to remember to be selfgentle. Thanks for sharing this wonderful piece of wisdom.
Richard, Canada
Everything else will fall with greater ease when we are calm and not riddled with anxiety and stress.
Cara, Canada
I loved Femke's gentle, guiding tone and have noticed a shift in my inner voice.
Nita
Simple, effective, and oh so powerful! Will definitely repeat this wonderful course.
Barbara, USA
Truly life changing. I'm grateful beyond words.
Linda, USA
I found this course very helpful and encouraging. I'm immediately going to start it again to reinforce it.
Carolyn
Initially the words are difficult to believe. It becomes more of a reality by the end.
Caryn, Canada
I cannot hear this enough. I'd love to keep hearing it, until I hear it in my own voice someday.
Lori, USA
You can tell you walk the talk. I can give no higher compliment.
Laoise
Finding your way back to yourself
Can this help when you keep getting pulled back into old patterns?
what people experience
Your wisdom is truly great. Thank you for your guidance out of dark spaces, helping to guide the way back to the light.
Jacqueline
I honestly didn't realize how much I start my day with worry until now. I'm going to be saving this meditation to my favourites and practising often.
Jessi
I love this little reminder to check in with myself, choose to be selfgentle and listen to what I would like.
Annemiek, Netherlands
I used to think I was 'pausing' but I wasn't, as I kept thinking about what I was going to do next. Today it has become very important to pause while being present.
Val
It's been a core practice I've been learning through this meditation and through other meditations and IFS this past few months!
Justin, USA
It is so comforting during a difficult day and even on an easy day.
Bridie, Ireland
Such a calming voice. I keep coming back to this simple but powerful meditation.
Moira
I have this one bookmarked and love to come back to it often in my evening meditation session.
Annie, Australia
This course came as a gift. Just at the moment when I needed it most I found this course and it felt so good. I can feel I am making progress. I thank you with all my heart.
Daisy, Netherlands
I found this really relaxing and grounding. It's good when you need a reset.
Jo
This is a wonderful relaxed way to start the day consciously aware of your own feelings and needs.
Désirée, Netherlands
Thank you for this permission to follow my own path this morning.
Aideen, USA
What it actually feels like to meditate with Femke
Does meditation actually help when you've tried everything else?
what people experience
I appreciate your words of encouragement and support for being selfgentle and living with self love.
Carrie, USA
A lovely reminder from the beginning of the day. Sets the mode for me to be selfgentle and kind to me all day!
Helene, Australia
I love the phrase 'I am pretty loveable right now', it really made me smile and I'm still smiling!
Kate, UK
It felt so warm and comforting, it was as though Femke was sitting next to me, understanding exactly how I was feeling.
Elizabeth
My feelings got hurt badly this morning, and I needed this. Just a few seconds in hearing your voice made me cry.
Caroline, USA
Today is the 20th anniversary of my Mom's passing. I opened up my IT and this was the first one I saw. Call it fate or coincidence but it was actually what I needed.
Kriss, USA
A spoken hug. Such sweet comforting words. I am grateful for this powerful meditation.
Annemiek, Netherlands
I feel calmer and content. The warmth of gratitude and connection has filled my body.
Josephine
It's a lot of spaciousness in a little time, and helps to open my heart to myself, and from there to others.
Mark, USA
That was a great reminder to be grateful for even the smallest things. Thank you for helping me sleep!
Grant, USA
Thank you for a very beautiful way to begin sleep, with gratitude and remembering that each day brings new opportunities.
Valeria
What selfgentleness does for your relationships with others
Can being kinder with yourself actually change how you relate to people?
what people experience
While it did help me to begin the process of showing more love and understanding toward others who do not share my views, it also equipped me with the tools needed to have better relationships with everyone around me. I have started to heal a broken relationship with my mother. It's an incredible change after just ten days.
Alicia, USA
It gave me useful tools for how to respond when triggered by others' opinions and behaviour.
Sarah Sofie, Switzerland
It's like forgiving: we do it to make ourselves more peaceful and to have a better life for ourselves. We can't control other people's judgements, only our own.
Patricia, USA
Intolerance is an easy road to walk, but tolerance takes strength and courage. Femke walks the listener through this difficult territory with respect and gentleness.
Colette, USA
While I still seem to have a visceral reaction when trying to display loving kindness to the person I'm least tolerant of, it does seem to be lessening. I'm hopeful with much practice, I might actually mean it.
Kimber, USA
This course helps us remember that the change we want to see must start with us in order to move forward.
Art, USA
It opens up tolerance and helps to understand our emotional triggers when it comes to confrontation with others.
Riccardo, Netherlands
It helped me enormously in taking a new perspective.
Judith, Netherlands
To extend compassion and love with grace and forgiveness to others with whom we have different perspectives. May we all learn to be more tolerant.
Annie, Australia
I was missing someone so much it physically hurt. After this meditation I feel full of love and gratitude and at peace.
Ulli, USA
This wonderful meditation brought me so close to my daughter and enabled me to release some of the grief of not having her around.
Lisa, UK
I absolutely recommend to anyone looking to feel reconnected with someone they miss.
Morgan
I have a tendency to ruminate over old conversations. This definitely helps.
Mark, USA
Life-changing information!
Andie, USA
Wonderful insights, guidance, very helpful.
Toni, New Zealand
What people say about working with Femke directly
Is a workshop or personal session with femke worth it?
what people experience
A wonderful insight into how to become selfgentle. She included all of us very well, individually and as a group. Femke's pace and style of teaching made it very easy to understand. I would very highly recommend Femke's course — it keeps on giving in our ongoing lives.
Evie, UK — workshop participant
Femke's gentle coaching style was exactly what I needed at a very difficult time in my life. She quickly understood my situation and suggested thought practices I could easily carve into my day-to-day. My session finished with a personalized meditation visualization that was both comforting and empowering. After my session, I was given a link to the recording so I can practice whenever I want. Thank you Femke, for a wonderful 1:1 session!
Janet, Canada — personal session
I felt so supported by Femke throughout the whole process. She made herself available to us for any questions. Femke is a wonderful instructor and she made the entire experience fun, relaxing, and informative.
April — workshop participant
Femke is generous with her time and knowledge. Her kind heart and compassion shines through everything she leads us to and through. Femke is one of the best teachers on here.
Randi, USA — workshop participant
She created a very safe space for us to be ourselves. Would recommend her workshops.
Angela, USA — workshop participant
Femke is a kind, intelligent teacher and we had a wonderful group!
Suzannah — workshop participant
Really enjoyed the workshop. Very in depth and versatile. Full of knowledge, calm voice, easy to follow.
Sunita, UK — workshop participant
An excellent workshop that helped me understand the theory behind mindfulness and gave me the tools to build my own practice independently.
Sina — workshop participant
I so appreciated Femke being so open and vulnerable which allowed everyone else to be as well. She held a very welcoming space for all of us.
April — workshop participant
You Don't Need to
Fix Yourself
You need to relate to yourself differently.
This short reflection helps you see what’s already there, and where you could have your own back more consistently.
I help self-aware people stop being so hard on themselves — for good.
Creator of the Selfgentleness Perspective™.
Founder of the Selfgentleness Academy™.
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© 2026 Femke E. Bakker | Design by TONIC | Images from Unsplash + Ruben Verheul + Hans Galesloot
Reviews